Friday, December 17, 2010

Run, Fatboy, Run!!

Posted by Sean Doyle, December 17, 2010.
Graphic by Sean & Colin Doyle.

Karma's a bitch, Number #5.

So now we hear Donald Sterling, the NBA's variation on the crazy old uncle concept, is heckling his own "star" player Baron Davis* from the sidelines. Mr. Sterling's bellows have reportedly contained references to Baron's rotundity and, of course, his ever feeble game. To which I say yes!!! Hells yes!!! Despite what protestations may emanate from the bla-bla-osphere, Baron Davis is fat and his game is shitty. He is lazy and arrogant and overpaid and deserves to be heckled on a nightly basis for pulling down $13 million dollars while averaging 8 points and 5 assists for a 5-20 team. I know, you say how can I defend someone like Donald Sterling? Well, I hate to dust off my old cliche machine but (clearing my throat) even a broken clock is right twice a day.

*I remember going to a Knicks-Clippers game at the Garden a few years back and being truly astounded by the bizarrely mediocre performance turned in by Baron Davis. I recall one play in particular really pissed me off. Davis ambled down the court at turtleman-speed and then, with 3 defenders on him, 2 wide open teammates and a ton of time left on the shot clock, heaved up an awkward 3 point shot that fell well short of the rim. It was one of the most selfish and stupid things I had ever seen on a basketball court.

1 comment:

  1. As an Obese American I resent the tone of this article